We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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