Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
