he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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