is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
