I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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