Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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