....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize