Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
