let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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