smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I just had sex on a roof
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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