wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
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The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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