One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
