Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I am available for nakedness
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
