I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
