I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
True strength comes from lack of pants
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Randomize
