so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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