I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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