Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
