Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize