My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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