Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
You can't special order awesome
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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