they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
