He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.