was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Randomize
