Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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