Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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