Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
