If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
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Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
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Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
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