Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
