You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
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I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
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When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
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