It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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