Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize