Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
