all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
