their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
are you so shy because you have an std?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
