I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
someone threw a dead crab at me
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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