I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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