Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
