just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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