Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize