It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
