What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
