I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Randomize