when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
