Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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