I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
