I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Be still, my beating vagina.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
