happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
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