I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize