You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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